Archive | April, 2010

two stories

8 Apr

This morning, very early, I woke up because my face was tingling like crazy. Crazy enough for me to grab at whatever was making it do that and throw it across the room. It turns out there was a very big roach crawling on my face. (I need to mention here that our house is really really clean. We don’t leave food out ever, and we always take out the trash in a timely manner. We just live by a big field so bugs like to come in for some shade sometimes.) I got up to finish murdering the roach and I put it in my trash can and tried to go back to sleep. The roach’s nerves were still firing off or something so there was noise going on in my trash can since it’s lined with a noisy plastic bag. I got up and put the bag in the kitchen garbage can and tried again to go back to sleep. Just as I was dozing off a guy came over to fix our broken air conditioner, so the dog began to bark forever. This morning I was not destined to sleep in late as I had hoped.

A few weeks ago I decided to start running again. I have since gone about 6 or 7 times total, and every time I’ve gone I get chased by a dog. They’re always pretty big and always very fast, and it has been a different one every time. I found out that we live outside of city limits, so there is no leash law. One time I was running from one and a lady rode past me on a big pink beach cruiser bike with a huge parrot on her shoulder. I thought, “Ahhhh, yeah. The dog’s totally gonna go for that bird lady,” but it was like it didn’t even see her. So the next time I went I decided that I’m bigger than these dogs, so all I have to do is show that I’m not scared of them. Perhaps I should even scare them instead. A dog started chasing me from pretty far away, so I turned and started sprinting directly at it. I think it only made it angrier because it seemed like it started speeding up and barking more. I decided it’d probably be best if I gave up on that idea, so I turned and went the other way. Really fast. A few days later I was driving to work and there were about 5 dogs sitting in a yard, all of them watching me drive by in unison. I think they’re out to get me.

here’s an awesome old picture of my mom in high school. She’s the third from the left.